Tag: growth

Why Therapy?

We all make choices. Every day.

What to eat, what to wear, where to work and how to live.

Our choices impact our relationships. Our relationships determine who we become and how well we live.

The problem is, we rarely understand why we make the choices we make. Events or non-events from childhood, unconscious decisions made years ago, resentments… For most of us there are dozens of issues from our past that color our present.

Uncovering these issues and resolving them changes our future.

That’s why I do what I do.

I know this work changes lives. I’ve seen it hundreds of times. And I’ve experienced it for myself. I’ve seen families saved. Lives and loves changed for better, forever.

I see it. Every day.

You can too.


3 Most Important Factors To Consider In Choosing a Therapist

Choosing a therapist was a log harder than I expected.  There were a lot of options.
I never wanted to go to therapy.  
At all!
Then one day I realized that I was hurting the people I loved and I couldn’t stop. So I went.  
My first therapist was amazing.  Later I would learn, both personally and professionally, that they’re not all that way.   
So I understand the difficulties of choosing a therapist.  I can relate to the pain, the fear, and finally having the need to reach out to a professional.  Whether you choose me or someone else, I want to support you in your journey toward finding a someone who can help. 
Over the years I’ve taught therapists in graduate school as well as hired and fired them as a director. Some of them are…  better than others.  Here are some suggestions that I hope prove helpful:
1. Connection matters: 
Find someone you trust. You should feel at ease in their presence and have a sense of their competence. You should know, without a doubt, that they’ll be able to keep everything you say in complete confidence.
2. Specialization matters: 
Postgraduate training and certifications cost time and money. The top clinicians I’ve seen work are willing to invest in continuing education to help their patients. 
3. Personal experience matters:
Time and time again, this has proven to be THE MOST important factor in clinical excellence.  Find someone who has done their own therapy. Master therapist Carl Jung said to his students, “you cannot see in others what you cannot see in yourself.” The clinician you working with is much more likely to be able to guide you through things that he or she has gone through themselves. Many clinicians don’t believe in extensive personal disclosure, but at the very least finding out if they’ve gone through their own therapy is a step in the right direction.
These guidelines will prove a step in the right direction in terms of finding a clinician who can be of maximum service in your journey.  I wish you the best!

Learning from Death – Grief and Recovery

Sunday night a friend died.  One of his friends says “He went home for Thanksgiving.  I’m pretty sure he scored some dope there and he wanted to get it all used up before school started again.”

He was one of my favorites.

Super funny kid. 

But, like most mascots, he was scared of his pain. 

Another of his friends said “I remember when I first got into a treatment center here locally.  The guy who checked me in said ‘if you do the deal and stick around, you’re going to see a lot of people die.’ I just didn’t expect it to be him.”

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