Anxiety is one of the most common struggles we have in the modern world – and it’s also one of the most misunderstood.
Anxiety happens in the brain, not just the mind.
The old school of thought was that changing our thoughts would change our anxiety. That’s true to a point, but many who use the traditional methods of anxiety treatment (commonly referred to as CBT) discover that there comes a point where they get as better as they’re going to get, and then they have to “learn to manage.”
Using CBT with other, modern treatment approaches like somatic experiencing (explained below) can be much more effective at actually stopping the compulsive thoughts, irrational fears and other difficulties assocated with severe anxiety.
SE and NARM for Complex trauma
When I started as a therapist the only thing we knew to do with trauma was to talk about it.
Turns out, talking about traumatic events often increases negative symptoms of trauma. Telling your story for the first time can be a bit liberating, and so can understaning how your past is impacting your present…
But knowing why doesn’t help when we’re triggered.
That’s why I studied Somatic Experiencing (SE) and the Nuero-Affective Relational Model (NARM). Both approaches resolve trauma’s that get stored in parts of the brain that are non-verbal. When we address and resolve those parts, the uncontrollable responses slip away. And that’s when you get your life back. You get to be in control of your emotions instead of the other way around.
It can be surprising to hear this, but grief is actually a normal response to change. And yet, despite the fact that it’s a universal experience and a part of living that’s inevitable our culture has provided us with very little tools or training to deal with it.
There are a wide variety of circumstances that lead to grief – divorce and/or death of a loved one, family member, or friend are some of the most acceptable reasons to grieve within our culture.
Grief can also come from the loss of a job, transition to a new life stage (such as retirement), children leaving home, loss of a pet, loss of a friendship… really anything that shifts identity.
Sex and porn Addiction
Sex can be a pretty complicated topic. People ask me all th e time “How do I know if I’m a sex addict?” My answer is always the same; a behavior becomes an addiction when it has negative consequences and it still can’t be stopped.
Over the years I’ve worked with people who’ve lost jobs due to use of pornography, lost marriages due to use of prostitutes, considered suicide in the face of public exposure, faced incarceration due to the materials they were viewing… and the list get’s more extreme from there. In all cases there is a common thread; no matter how bad the risk, they seemingly could not stop on their own.
Recovery from Sex Addiction doesn’t happen by accident. Make sure you find someone with training or expeirence (hopefully both) to be your guide.
Drug and ALcohol Recovery
Addiction is an equal-opportunity disease – rich or poor, young or old, black or white… It’s also a terminal disease if left untreated. Since starting on my own journey to recovery in 2001 I’ve seen countless lives lost to addiction – both clients and friends.
Many of those who died had enjoyed periods of sobriety lasting years, but ended up going back to their addiction (or just killing themselves) because they never dealt with the conditions that caused the problem to begin with.
So that’s what I’ve set out to do. Providing life-changing information and treatment that leads to healing for people in recovery is my life’s mission.